Joke: I am plankton! Rules of work #2...
1. Do your best to keep me late. I adore this office and really have nowhere to go or anything to do. I have no life beyond work.
2. If you give me more than one job to do, don't tell me which is the priority. I am psychic.
3. If you don't like my work, tell everyone. I like my name to be popular in conversations. I was born to be whipped.
4. Tell me all your little problems. No one else has any and it's nice to know someone is less fortunate. I especially like the story about having to pay so many taxes on the bonus check you received for being such a good manager.
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